Sometimes Our Best Isn't Good Enough
An old Aesop fable begins with a hungry fox that spotted some grapes. They were a cluster of dark, ripe grapes hanging high on a vine. She jumped, stretched, and tried every trick she knew, but no matter how hard she tried, the grapes were just out of reach. Exhausted, she finally walked away, muttering, "They were probably sour anyway."
It's a familiar move. When our best effort doesn't get the results we hoped for, it's tempting to downplay what we wanted in the first place. We tell ourselves it didn't matter, that it wasn't worth it, or that our effort was "good enough." We're often taught that doing our best is "always enough." It sounds comforting-but it isn't always true.
You already know this from experience. You may have given it your all and still lost a sports game, missed a promotion, weren't chosen, or watched an opportunity slip away. Effort doesn't guarantee outcomes.
When our best isn't good enough, the real issue isn't failure-it's what we do next. Pretending it was enough may protect our ego, but it also keeps us stuck. Growth starts with honesty.
There are valid reasons why even when we try our best, it may not measure up. Sometimes the outcome was out of our control. Sometimes the standard was objective and we didn't meet it. Sometimes others were simply better. None of this means we aren't capable-it means we've found a limit. This is human.
At this point, you have a choice: improve your "best" by learning, training, or changing your approach-or accept that this may not be the right path and walk away without rewriting the story to soothe the disappointment.
A Better "Best"
You may see it right away, or it may take some collaboration to see what needs improving-and what is worth pursuing-to improve your current "best." That might mean training differently, building new skills, getting feedback from others, or pushing beyond your comfort zone. Giving your best doesn't always mean you prepared the right way; improvement comes from honest analysis and trying new approaches.
Investing Wisely
If the answer is to accept that you need to choose a different path, you may need to change the environment. This is going to come with some letdown, and a temptation to rewrite history, "I never wanted it, anyhow." Disappointment is hard to feel, but don't try to sugarcoat it. You need to feel this to make the future adjustments needed. It will teach you what not to focus on, to involve other ways of thinking, and increase your resilience and flexibility. Not only that, but adjusting your goals or the environment can matter more than forcing your efforts in the wrong direction. A good example of this is when someone is in charge of a work team. Constant micromanagement may technically work, but it causes burnout and hurts other team members. Changing the structure, not effort, typically leads to better results.
The takeaway is comprehensible: growth comes from knowing when to improve your skills and when to change the conditions. Both require clarity, not just effort. The fox didn't fail because the grapes were sour. She failed because they were out of reach for now. The lesson isn't to pretend you never wanted them-it's to decide whether you're willing to grow tall enough to reach them, or wise enough to choose a different vine.
Citations
Macdonald, J (2021) What To Do When Your Best Isn't Good Enough: https://johnmaconline.com/what-to-do-when-your-best-isnt-good-enough/#:~:text=And%20Why%20the%20%E2%80%9CDoing%20Your,best%20isn't%20good%20enough.
Aesop's Fables (p. 61). Amazon Digital Services, Inc. Translated by George Fyler Townsend.
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