Celebrate More Than Love This Valentine's Day
Valentine's day, it’s a day some people hate, and a day some people love, but no matter how you feel, it is fast approaching. Regardless of if you are currently in a relationship and have something special planned for your sweetheart (pro tip: do not let Valentine’s day be the only day you do this) or if you are single and ready to mingle, it is important to know that there is a well of love that maybe you have not thought to tap into this Valentine’s Day.
When we preoccupy ourselves with romantic love, we neglect the opportunity to see that love comes in various forms and is more stable and readily available to us. Maybe we can expand our view of February 14th to be more inclusive; perhaps we can use Valentine's Day to celebrate love in all forms.
The ancient Greeks were really on to something (a lot of things, really) when they identified multiple forms of love; they distinguished them through different words so as to be clear what form of love was being expressed/shared with others.
We all know one to be Eros, which is the one largely associated with Valentine's Day; this is a love defined by being struck down by cupid's arrow. Eros is sexual or passionate love and is most akin to the modern construct of romantic love.
Below are three other forms of love you can focus on this Valentine’s Day that are sure to fill your cup and maybe change your mind about the holiday.
Philia
Philia is the love you find/share through friendship. Aristotle believed that a person can bear goodwill to another for one of three reasons: that he is useful, that he is pleasant, and that he is good, meaning, rational, and virtuous. Simply put, this is the love you share for your bestie. The friend(s) that you would go to great lengths to show up for and speak with compassion, love, and authenticity. Real friends seek together to live truer, fuller lives by relating to each other authentically therein developing a strong bond.
What you can do to celebrate this love:
Schedule a “Galentines” or “Malentines” party or celebration with your friends
Get your friends cards or flowers sharing how much you value their friendship
Agape
The unselfish love! Agape is universal love, such as the love for strangers, nature, or God (spirituality, mother nature, etc.). This love focuses on the human’s ability to love outside of oneself. Agape is an empathetic love toward humanity itself and is oftentimes connected to altruism (caring for and loving others without expecting anything in return.)
What you can do to celebrate this love:
Go out and celebrate nature
Serve at a shelter
Participate in a community clean up
Philautia
The love of self is not to be taken as hubris, the unhealthy love of self, but the healthy kind! Think Self-esteem! Our thought processes and emotional appraisal of our own worth. A great way to cultivate philautia is by cultivating self-awareness, listening, and honoring your body and its needs.
What you can do to celebrate this love:
Give yourself a spa day
Buy yourself flowers
Take yourself out to dinner
Spend time with yourself in nature
Move your body (take a walk, hike, yoga)
Consider being expansive with love this Valentine’s Day by celebrating all forms of love. There is a lot more love out there than you think.
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