Boundaries in Collectivistic Cultures
I want you to Google the word boundary. What results come up for you? A divided line? A limit? Enforced rules? There are many meanings for the word boundary. In the world of therapy, boundaries mean respecting your limits. What you allow between yourself and others. What is your comfort, or how you would want others to treat you. Boundaries hold great significance. They protect our peace and allow us to respect that of others. However, boundaries don’t exist everywhere. In fact, in some cultures, enforcing boundaries could be seen as a sign of disrespect. Maybe even rebellious. Let’s explore that for a bit.
Individualistic vs Collectivistic Cultures
The Western world adapts an individualistic mindset. You, as an individual, are valued alongside your wishes, dreams, wants, and needs. Family is important; however, there is greater importance for your individuality. The Eastern world is very much collectivistic. This means the goals, values, wants, and needs of the group are prioritized over individual needs. With that being said, we can get an idea of why boundaries may not be favorable in collectivist cultures. The traditions and culture of communities that favor family-oriented values may not work with Western norms. The harmony and cohesiveness of the group are valuable. It is a sign of great wisdom and respect when you think of others. In collectivist cultures, caring for yourself alongside others is key. Interdependence rather than independence is encouraged. Nonetheless, some degree of independence is expected. Perhaps a slightly different kind of independence. An independence in which your ethics, principles, and morals are respected, seen, and heard. Therefore, how do we integrate boundaries in an appropriate way? Through “workable boundaries”.
Workable Boundaries
Dr. Shabnam Brady coined the term “workable boundaries”. A workable boundary considers the principles and morals of both the individual and the culture. Boundaries are not always permanent; for some people, having flexible boundaries is necessary. Having workable boundaries removes the pressure of having to follow the values or expectations of the dominant culture. For instance, in many Middle Eastern communities, it is frowned upon if adult children move out of their parents’ home. The principle of caring for one another, especially parents, is not only culturally rooted but religiously as well. In many collectivist cultures, choosing your spouse is a family matter. Although the final decision is taken by one individual, the process involves many close family members. Raising children, choosing a career, holding the honor and legacy of your family name are a few of the norms that might not resonate with the dominant culture (i.e., Western values), and that is completely ok. Workable boundaries are for everyone, whether you identify with collectivist values or individualistic principles. It could work for all.
The importance of boundary setting is non-negotiable; however, it is essential to have a nonassumptive approach. Recognizing the various worldviews that come with each person is essential. Many people do not live by the values of the dominant culture. Supporting bicultural individuals or individuals who identify with various cultures holds its complexity as well as its beauty. Considering boundaries as a culturally inclusive setting in which we withhold ourselves from making speculations about what is healthy/normal vs unhealthy/abnormal is vital. Everyone deserves to feel seen, heard, understood, and appreciated. That is the beauty of being culturally sensitive.
Roubicek & Thacker Counseling is Fresno’s premier provider of individual, couples, family, and group therapy. We offer in-person and online remote therapy sessions. Contact us today to change the way you feel.
