3 Ways to Be a Better Listener with Your Kids
Being able to attentively listen to our kids is a healthy way for them to open up to us and share what is going on with them. Having attunement to our kids is one of the greatest gifts in how they can receive love from us as their parents/caregivers.
Here are 3 ways to be a better listener to them.
Give your child undivided attention.
Putting your electronics aside such as your cell phone, tablet, and laptop, make eye contact and use full body language by saying to them with an open posture, “I am here. I am ready to hear you.” Non-verbal communication is powerful and is one the biggest indicators that you are interested in whatever they have to say. It indicates you are ready and open to listen.
Ask open-ended questions.
For example, instead of asking, “How was your day?” Ask, “What was the best part of your day and why?” Children tend to process a little slower than most adults, so being patient and allowing your child to get the words out is a very important step. Give them space, and wait patiently for them. Tune in to non-verbal cues to see if there is something more while they are working through and processing.
Show acceptance.
When our kids feel safe to share, they will open up and feel heard. They can therefore be able to express themselves, which will help kids come back to us again and again. Even when small or big things are on their minds, acceptance is the key to openness and connection. If they feel heard and understood they will feel open to share, and it provides a safety net to further open communication.
As we learn to parent our kids, listening to them is one area that can help them with growth and healthy development in areas so they feel safe and secure. As we focus on listening to them, it will show them not only that what they have to say matters to us, but by exemplifying to them what good listening does for the soul. In showing them how they are loved and how attentive listening helps, all relationships can blossom one conversation at a time.
Roubicek & Thacker Counseling is Fresno’s premier provider of individual, couples, family, and group therapy. We offer in-person and online remote therapy sessions. Contact us today to change the way you feel.